With Nicole Paige Brooks gone and leaving a sweet, “Be safe, bitch” scrawled on the mirror in her wake, the girls settle in for a country-themed SheMail, followed by a similarly country-themed RuPaul the man when he comes a-courtin’ the gals decked out in a red and white paisley and polka dot Western shirt and cowboy hat.
He informs them that their mini-challenge this week is to eat a bunch of stuff blindfolded and decide if it’s chicken or “what.” The first two to correctly discern which is which will win the challenge. Raven snarks that Mystique will finally win a challenge this week.
And she’s right. Mystique, Morgan, and Pandora all guess “what” correctly for the exotic dishes of bull testicles, soy chicken, and frog legs.
Since it’s a three-way tie and there can only be two winners, the girls have to throw down in an “Eat Off,” gobbling the contents of a basket filled with deep fried chicken, rabbit, and cow brains. As Raven said, once again, Mystique wins it easily. It’s down to Morgan and Pandora and Morgan projectile vomits all over the place. However, booting her foot doesn’t disqualify her and she scarfs down the rest of the contents and Pandora craps out. Mystique and Pandora are the two captains of the teams for this week’s mega challenge, which is to shill for pretend product, “Disco” extra-greasy shortening. The girls must sell it Country Queen-style, as a homage to Atlanta, the town where Ru’s career took off.
The choose between two commercial scripts, one for country-fried fish and the other for country-fried chicken. Mystique chooses fish, which is the wise choice with inherent comedy written all over it. As captain, she assigns the role of the Disco Critter (a chicken) to Jessica Wild to try to camouflage her lack of English skills. Throughout this challenge, Mystique comes across as actually really sweet and nice.
The other team with Mean Girls Morgan McMichaels and Raven are all about making snide comments about Mystique winning the challenge on the basis of chowing down. Mystique takes it in stride but confides to the camera that words are just words, but they still hurt.
The girls are midway through learning their scripts when Ru tells them that celebrity guest judge Kathy Najimi will be their guest coach — and also throws the girls a curveball by telling them that they have to switch scripts. Team Mystique will now be doing chicken while Team Morgan is serving up fish. Harsh.
The rehearsals go somewhat well with some girls taking direction better than others. Jujubee is funny and cute as the sexpot Ellie Mae. Jessica does pretty well as the Disco Critter. Mystique falls somewhat flat as Grandma and has a hard time taking direction. Tatianna is adequate as Baby, but improves given some direction, while Pandora shines as Ma.
Team Morgan doesn’t do too bad, but Morgan’s hilariously ribald fish jokes by spreading her legs as Grandma find themselves nixed by Kathy. (Hell, I thought they were funny, however Kathy and Tyra both deemed them “crass.” Raven and her creepy Joker makeup and flat delivery are awful as the Disco Critter. Sahara is a bit over the top and not all that sexy as Ellie Mae, but still good. Tyra’s man-voice contrasted with her pretty face make for a great “Baby Just Outta Prison” and Sonique does a totally trashtastic job as Ma.
Following filming their commercials, the girls are asked to change into their runway gear, this time, adding some country flavor to their couture when they parade in front of judges Merle and Santino, as well as guest judges Kathy Najimi and Tanya Tucker.
At the runway judging, RuPaul’s gown is a gorgeous lemon confection, sporting a pink wig and looking like a tall glass of pink lemonade. She mentions that now it’s time for the girls to put the “Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent” back into “country.” Oh, how I love a good pun!
On the runway, Sonique works the “stripper hot” vibe with a Pam Anderson inspired leather cowgirl getup. Jujubee is cute and country while Raven goes all-out Farmer’s daughter with an off-the-shoulder gingham top and cut-off shorts. Sahara looks kind of like a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, amping that factor up with her outfit by doing a little dance. Tatianna does country with an urban twist and reminds me a bit of Rebecca Glasscock from Season 1. Jessica Wild ends up reminding me of Rebecca, too, with her white raccoon eyes makeup. She redeems it with a cinched waist corset over a flannel shirt and applebottom jeans that accentuate a huge booty! Go, Jessica!! Morgan’s look is actually a femmed up version of Porter Wagoner with a “New Romantic” take on country.
The best and the worst, however, are Tyra and Mystique. Tyra pays homage to her aunt — who she claims more country than anyone she knows — and shows a creative piece that’s THREE country outfits all in one, complete with tear-away skirt that turns into a country cape! Mystique, however, decides to rock “Mall Country,” which looks like more of an afterthought than anything else with ill-fitting gaucho pants that look more like spandex and a sleeveless top. If she wanted to go all-out trashy, then black out a tooth or something! However, Mystique’s issues with drag may come into play here, wanting to look cute rather than country. She mentions that she was never told she was cute as a guy, but gets it all the time when she’s in drag.
This comes back to bite her in her ample booty when Ru reveals that the girls will be judged on their individual performances with no one team being safe. Jessica is commended for pulling it off as Disco Critter, overcoming her language barrier and Pandora reminds Tanya of herself with her kitchy country outfit before the judges tell Pandora that she was the stand-out comedienne of her group.
Tyra wins the overall challenge with her “Baby Just Outta Prison” routine in the commercial, although the judges tell her that she needs to create a female voice for Tyra instead of sounding super-butch and like there’s a bunch of manly marbles in her mouth. Tyra wins the challenge, as well as immunity next week.
Although Team Mystique was much better than Team Morgan, Mystique found herself in the bottom two alongside Disco Critter Gone Creepy, Raven. This is the second consecutive week that Raven has landed in the Bottom Two. After lip synching to some country song, Raven shontays n’ stays, putting on a solid performance, while Mystique just can’t quite cut it on the song and goes home… But not before busting a split!
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